we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
Anywho, an ostrich attacked me today. Fucking useless pieces of shit birds.
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
FUCK WHALES
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
Randomize
