Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
Also, new rule: You are no longer allowed to send me a text with the word "dildo" in it before 10am.
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
I can't trust your balls anymore.
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
Randomize
