Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
Just brought out that old CCM hockey helmet. The one covered in sharpie penises with "DRUNK BUCKET" written across the front. The number of tally marks / initials from tonight's drunk stunts alone is equal parts inspiring and alarming.
His fucking flight got canceled because the president stopped at the airport he was flying out of... Fuckin Obama literally just cock blocked me
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
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