so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
She just told me she had a double jointed jaw and winked at me while eating her bananna. That's not possible right?
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
Help. Why am I so naked?
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