Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
at the gym hungover with vodka in a water bottle. don't say i'm not fulfilling my resolutions
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
I touched a dick in church today
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
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