Forgive me I'm always horny when I wake up
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
Randomize
