just heard 2 nerds making fun of a girl for mispronouncing stochiometry. they followed it up by discussing the mathematical equation for getting laid. my day just became 100x better.
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
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