Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
We've started traveling with Michael and Patrick so we can pretend we're two legit straight couples.
A charade that fell apart the second another couple on the cruse found Sarah face down in my box on an observation deck.
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
Randomize