dude facebook disabled my account because im registered under a false identity. now in order to get it back, i have to prove that it's really my name. i sent them an email and had to sign it "Cordially, Lloyd Pancakes"
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
A guy I hooked up with YEARS ago just endorsed me on LinkedIn for "customer service".
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
just had a woman ask me to donate my eggs so that her baby could look like me. don't know whether to get a restraining order or be flattered. thoughts?
Randomize