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• (586): View more from Michigan

  I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market

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• (214): View more from Texas

  i just renamed my vag "the sorting hat"

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• (571): View more from Virginia

  he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time

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• (310): View more from California

  you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.

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  27 Parents Confess Shocking Secrets Their Kids Don’t Know

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• (425): View more from Washington

  I swear to god I'm going to hunt down and stab the next telemarketer that calls from a blocked number while I'm waiting for my STD results...

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• (604): View more from British Columbia

  Like if Robert Downey Jr. and Kiefer Sutherland got together for a bender, that's how drunk I want us to be.

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• (513): View more from Ohio

  He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.

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• (269): View more from Michigan

  I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.

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• (609): View more from New Jersey

  She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.

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  These 23 People Had The Most Insane Spring Breaks Ever

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• (254): View more from Texas

  STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST

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• (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future

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• (262): View more from Wisconsin

  Straight up asked lady in a lime green jumpsuit how to make your ass clap. That thing wiggled more beautifully than ocean waves at sunset

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• (778): View more from British Columbia

  I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was

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• (519): View more from Ontario

  One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.

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• (512): View more from Texas

  Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.

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