Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
shotgunning a bud heavy is like shotgunning a turkey sandwich
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
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