just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
Shes sitting on the front porch puking in to the pumpkin she just carved...in the rain. I guess pumpkin spice tequila shots wasnt our best idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
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