i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
Randomize
