Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
I can't believe we just used the phrase "jizz to juice ratio" in casual conversation.
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
I swear to god my spidey sense only tingles when someone’s about to die or you’re being a hoe.
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
Randomize
