I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Randomize
