I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
I like being woken up by phone calls of you sabotaging marriages
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
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