Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
I spent last night dying strippers pubes green and landscaping shamrocks. That is why hands look like I squashed a leprechaun.
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
I love you. Go after that dick
Hey. You dropped and smashed your road beer in my store last night. Again. And this time you didn't even order anything. You just walked in, yelled "SWEDISH STYLE!" Then lost your beer, looked depressed, and left.
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
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