Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
I'll pay for our taxi if you let me makeout with the drummer and we don't leave RIGHT when the bassist does.
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
Small penises have feelings too.
I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
I woke up this morning with a text from my mom as to why the hell random people were showing up at the house. Turns out nobody came to our house party because I gave them my old address, fuck pre-partying for real
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
Randomize
