When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
you spent 5 minutes trying to open an empty PBR and kept saying "don't worry i'll get it i've been working out"
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
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