there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
WELP I KNOW THE HAPPY HOUR DRINKS WERE GOOD BECAUSE MOM JUST INFORMED ME I AM THE RESULT OF POKED HOLE IN THE DIAPHRAGM
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
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