I don't remember. Are we still dating?
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
I've been alternating between telling people I was mauled by a bear or hit by a car to explain the massive unexplainable bruise on my leg. Slightly more worried now that the car idea is believable.
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
Randomize
