He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
In other news: I found out that my mom used to fuck my newest fuck buddy's dad when they were in school.
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
Randomize
