We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm eating tomato paste and drinking banana juice that is expired. Can we please get groceries tonight?
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
Woke up this morning with a darth vader helmet and a bath robe on with my toenails shitly painted
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
Gotta say, self-deprecating Lord of the Rings-themed sex jokes were not on my agenda for today.
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