had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
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