Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
What can I say, I bounce back quick. Never thought the line "my turtle died" would get me so many free drinks last night
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
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