He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
The president of the frat said he was honored to award me "Best Overall Blow Jobs", free admission to all their future parties, and a $20 gift certificate to Denny's. I'm not sure if I feel proud or if that's just the burrito coming back up...
Also, what are the symptoms of syphilis?
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
I'm eating cold pizza from work and drinking beer from a wine glass trying to decide if I want to shower or just rub one out and go to sleep. How have I ever gotten laid?
Because you're really hot before taking the time to actually get to know you.
Randomize
