watching jon and kate + 8 right now is like watching my parents split up
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
Randomize