I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
I just took a dump to end all dumps. Other dumps have already written ballads about it. It was the Armageddon dump. Bruce Willis was there, it was awful.
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
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