Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
It's such a good feeling to send those "I'm not in jail" texts on Sunday morning
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
Randomize
