Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
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second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
Just face planted the stairs. Apparently Santa brought an extra step while I was at the bar... Fucking dick
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
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Well my normal tinder strategy of "Will I have sex with her when I'm sober" has been paying off
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
I'm always down for nudity.
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
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