Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
Siri makes being stoned even easier. I don't even Have to type my texts myself
Though I typed a half of that one
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
Before I go in, is 'I just got a root canal 2 hours ago' a good excuse to show up drunk to yoga class with a 6 pack? Because if not I think I need to go home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
Oh, btw, UPS might come by. Drunk me ordered us $75 worth of gummy airhead starburst type candies. Whatever it is, it'll be delicious.
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
Are you hungover?
No. I'm hiding under my covers and hoping it doesn't find me.
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
Randomize