So I just opened the bag you gave me and those panties aren't mine...
oh
i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
yeah, you could tell they werent used to the strange things that i say. they were all outright shocked when i told one guy i hoped someone kidnapped him and stretched his dickhole over a fire hydrant
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
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