I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
No work today. I woke up and someone had written "Markhot Penis = Party" on my forehead in sharpie. Do you know a Mark?
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
You were spooning an empty magnum of white wine in the middle of the bed so I slept on the couch
Well at least there's no more confusion about your place in my life. Wine > pizza > your dick > the rest of you.
Love you...
Randomize
