Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
I almost died today via plastic wrap. I AM THE REASON THEY PUT WARNING LABELS ON THINGS.
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
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