My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
Randomize
