At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
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