I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
I'm sorry for aggressively singing the Frasier theme song at you so many times last night.
I am coming home with the worst sun burn of my life, two unused condoms, and an unworn slutty dress. Worst. Bachelorette. Party. Ever.
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
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