I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
Based on the fact my iPad is covered in pizza, I'm going to assume I ate pizza last night
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
hot take: drunk me can walk through walls?
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