I hope you're ready because I look like an elf on crack had a baby in the medieval era and that baby grew up to be a whore
How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you left a note on your car that said " please dont tow, im to drunk to drive. safety first!"
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
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