Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
Woke up with feathers in my hair. at work. still drunk. sooo awkward.
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
How drunk are you?
Completed.
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize