Why are handjobs necessary in class?
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
when I woke up the last searched thing on my phone was "how to make a fireproof dress" I need to stop drinking.
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
I just gargled with NyQuil
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
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