Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
one two three fourrrrnication!
I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
He showed up to the Seder drunk and tried to convince everyone that he could read Hebrew.
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
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