Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
I smell like a brewery and I have been drinking for 7 hours. This seems like a perfect time to tell my husband I want a divorce.
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
He told me that he had never gotten a blow job. I sat there for a second, then thought "I MUST FIX THIS!" It was fucking fantastic.
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
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