I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
4 random people called me telling me they found him sleeping in the fetal postion on a driveway 45 minutes after we lost him
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
the wedding party just walked in to the song eye of the tiger. i'm getting drunk.
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
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