I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
Randomize
