that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
I have a pocket in my purse that is just for condoms and cocktail swords. I feel like that speaks volumes about me as a person
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
He wanted to watch a Charlie Brown thanksgiving. But I was like, fuck that, I'm a grown up. So we watched jumanji and I sucked his dick.
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
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