You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
Dude you called me last night to let me listen to you piss in a cup and drink it. Just making sure you survived
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
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