i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
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