so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
I'm on the toilet with no toilet paper. When are you coming over? I'm contemplating on just staying here until you arrive.
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
Randomize
