I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
you are never too drunk for berry picking
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
i just woke up in my dog's bed, on my parents floor, my outfit on backwards, and a bottle of lube poured down my pocket.
Randomize
